A funeral, a U2 concert, and a new way of thinking about effective youth ministry teams

3 11 2009

You may be wondering what this title means.   You just have to read to find out!

In the span of one week, my view of volunteers changed completely.

I have always appreciated my volunteers for their time committment and dedication. After all, I get paid to do what I do.  These volunteers do not.  They work long hours each day and then at the end of hard day or work they come to our church to hang out with students, play games, teach lessons, and lead small groups.  Even more amazing is that they willingly give up their free weekends at home to be with overly hyper and often annoying students, get little sleep and poor food options, only to get back late Sunday night and wake up at 5am the next day to go to work (while their youth pastor sleeps in).  They sacrifice a week of vacation time to go on missions trips and conferences, etc… You get the picture.

I also appreciate my volunteers for what they bring to our team. Each one is uniquely talented, gifted, and passionate about something that helps shape and form our team and youth group.  Some are great at administration, some love doing crazy games and skits, others can work magic with computers, and yet others love working behind the scenes to make sure our spaces are cleaned up when we leave.  Each person has a role and I realize that without their presence, we could get by each week, but the youth ministry would be a shadow of what it is and is becoming.  David Chow in his book, No More Lone Rangers, defines team centered youth ministry as “ministry with a diverse team of healthy, spiritually mature adults who share leadership and decision-making responsibilities, united by a vision to minister to young people and their families.”

Although I believed this in principle, the reality and beauty became evident recently.

We had a very big weekend fall retreat planned. I basically served as the program director and was doing one of the 3 lessons.  If you ever lead your own retreat, you probably know the amount of time, energy, and details that go into running one of these things.   The Thursday before we were supposed to leave, I received a phone call that my grandfather had passed away.  I was extremely close to him and lived in his house for the first twelve years of my life.  Shortly before his death, he asked me to do his funeral.   But there I was with this situation on my hands.  A choice between family and ministry.

I was torn.  I felt obligated and required to go on the retreat, but I knew I wanted to be with my family.  I also thought that i needed to be running the retreat as much as I was needed back home.

My leaders changed my thinking.

My former view of my leaders; their roles, potential, and importance…was radically challenged and changed at the same time

I was overwhelmed and humbled when my leaders all said, “Go home. Don’t worry about a thing.  We have it covered.”

I couldn’t believe them…well truth be told, I choose not to believe them because I still felt that I needed to be there. What about all those last minute details? Who will teach “my” lesson”.  What about going over the rules? What if this happens?  And perhaps the biggest questions, “What will the parents and church think if I am not there?”

What I had not been realizing was that over the years, the leaders had watched and learned from my leadership and example (and probably learned more from seeing my mistakes!) Not only were they willing and capable of leading the weekend, but the collection of them making group decisions and truly working as a team would be more effective than me!

Sometimes we just need to let go and trust our leaders.  Trust that God has been preparing them all along the way to step it when necessary and even take the youth ministries to new heights.  I need constant reminders that it’s not “my” program or ministry, and they are not “my” students.  Everything is God’s and he has and will always have the best interests of the students and group at heart.

You may be wondering what happened.  My grandfather’s wake and funeral were pushed back 2 days for various reasons, so I was able to attend. I left early on Sunday and my leaders took care of the rest of the weekend and return trip home.  But the entire weekend I knew that I didn’t have to be there, and since my leaders were prepared to lead, they ran most of it.

Three days later, U2 came to NY. My wife and I are huge U2 fans and when I had a chance to get some tickets over the summer, I grabbed 2 as soon as possible. The concert was scheduled for Friday night. For some reason that I am still unsure about, Friday’s show was moved to Wednesday (youth group night).

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You would think I learned my lesson.

I panicked.

I had a great lesson planned, complete with videos, interactive group discussion, experiential response, and small group questions.  I really wanted to be there and….to lead again!  But I also really wanted to go to U2.

I called one of my trusted leaders and was completely honest (even though at first I dabbled with the idea of a sudden illness coming over me!)

He said, “You and your wife need to go to the show.  Don’t worry about a thing.  We have it covered and youth group will be great!”     I also had a student mission committee meeting planned. One of my seniors said that she will step in and lead the meeting and the entire night went real smooth…in fact better than if I were there.

My students and leaders didn’t complain or question me not being there. They were happy for my wife and I (a little envious that they weren’t at Giants Stadium naturally), but they were happy for the chance to lead.  In the past, I would often include students and adults in leadership, but never really gave them ownership.

In the span of just one week, my views have changed and I have seen the light!

I am learning to trust my team, not just to fill in when necessary, but to be able to lead well.

One of my favorite U2 songs is  ”Sometimes you can’t make it on your own”.  A powerful line in the song is this   “Listen to me now. I need to let you know. You don’t have to go it alone.”

When we do ministry alone, we communicate to others that their role is to watch ministry, not do ministry.  Instead of preparing God’s people for ministry, we are preparing them to be consumers and spectators.

They actually played that song live and I was struck by the profound truth whether in a relationship with God, spouse, friends, or our leaders.  We need each other and are connected in the beautiful web of humanity and relationships.

David Chow offers some wonderful insights that I will conclude with. Again, it is one thing to believe this in theory, but quite another to live it in our ministries.  I encourage you to make strong attempts to do so in the months to come.

“Behind every great ministry is a great group of co-ministers.”

Effective teams extend the ministry well beyond a single person

Effective teams raise the quality of ministry programs and events to a higher level

Effective teams expand the number and types of students being ministered to

Team-centered ministry produces new leaders

A team approach benefits the ministry long term.





28 10 2009





The firing of YS Marko

22 10 2009

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The youth ministry world took a big hit this morning.  A press release from Youth specialties and their parent company Zondervan announced the “release” of YS president Mark Oestreicher.

YS press release

I haven’t had much time to think about this, and perhaps I should wait a few weeks to reflect…

But nevertheless I feel compelled to write.  But before I get to some personal thoughts, I wanted to share a brief history/overview of how Marko came to be so important to youth workers in the 21st century.

Youth Specialties was founded and developed by men of boldness and courage, who were not afraid to push the limits.  Mike Yaconelli was a modern-day prophet (especially to youth workers).  His books Messy Spirituality, Dangerous Wonder, and the Core Realities of Youth Ministry gave me hope for youth ministry and inspired me to enter the family and stay the course.

Grace was given and received.  Theology and rules questioned (and broken).  There was, for the first time, a true sense of freedom and joy accompanied with youth ministry.  You were given permission to be yourself and be the person God was shaping you to be (not made to feel guilty that you were not conforming to someone else’s image or expectations)

No one really cared about what others thought of you or how many people you might offend.  Authentic faith was demonstrated in the lives of youth workers and then modeled and passed down to generations of students across denominational lines.   I even remember hearing that Yaconelli told the crowd at  one YS convention that if they needed rest for their souls to skip the sessions and workshops and sleep and play.  And…. if their marriages were rocky, to go grab a bottle or two of wine and lock themselves in their hotel room for the weekend!

He understood the plight of youth workers and also knew what real refreshment was like (spiritual, physical, emotional).  And we learned together that sometimes laughter is the best remedy.

The first YS convention I attended occurred one month after Mike’s tragic car accident.  Myself, along with 5,000 other youth workers wondered what would happen.  What would become of YS?

Who would take over (not just the leadership) but the prophetic voice of Yaconelli?

Marko received that calling and answered it well.

Every year since, I have witness Yaconelli’s dreams flourished and expand.

Marko embraced all, loved everyone, and found grace and truth in everything.

Under his leadership, not only did YS expand cross culturally and around the world, but new voices were given permission and a platform to share with the world.  The mission of God was put on center stage for us as both youth workers and followers of Jesus.

Recently, many of us read Marko’s last blog.  I have included the link below

The end of YS Marko

It appeared to me that God was preparing Marko for major change.  Perhaps this transition is a good thing.  Maybe not for YS right now or for the hundreds of thousands of youth workers, but for Marko and his family.

I don’t know.

I hope Zondervan made a decision based upon God’s leading and not a business decision.  But am not too naive to realize that sometimes tough decisions need to be made for the long-term benefit.  Perhaps visions were not aligning just right.  Perhaps God has something better in store for Marko.  Or perhaps, this is the wrong decision and time shall reveal the fate and consequences.

I choose not to question Zondervan at this time. I choose to pray for Marko, and wish him God’s absolute best.

I hope and pray that another prophet will emerge who will take up the torch and run wildly with abandon.

Marko, we all appreciate what you have meant to us.  Most of us never personally knew you, but we certainly felt like we did.

You kept us going and kept us excited and passionate for youth work. You lead by example, motivation, and inspiration.

May we pass on what you have taught us about grace-living life and loving God-serving students-having a global view- soul searching and spiritual formation-and being ourselves all the while.

Though you never knew me, you believed in me.  Thank you.

We believe in you and will continue to support you wherever God leads.

–appreciative youth workers from around the globe

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Relationships Unfiltered

15 10 2009

Relationships Unfiltered

Zondervan was kind enough to send me Andrew Root’s second book, Relationships Unfiltered, and I am glad they did.  I am not sure what the official release date was or is, but if you have not picked up this book, you will want to.  Author  and former youth pastor Tony Jones writes, “Relationships Unfiltered is the single most important youth ministry book in a generation.”

A quick summary:  This is a revised version of Root’s first masterpiece, Revisiting Relational Youth Ministry.  I wrote an extensive three part review of that book and have included the links below.

Revisiting Relational Youth Ministry_review part 1

Revisiting Relational Youth Ministry_review part 2

Revisiting Relational Youth Ministry_final review

While the first book was soaked in theological ideas and seminary language, this book appears to be written for a more general audience.  Not to say that others could not read or benefit from his first book, but Relationships Unfiltered is a perfect blend of stories, reflections, Scriptural interpretation, and practical approaches that can benefit anyone in youth ministry.  Besides, any book that mentions some of my favorite movies has to be worth the read.  In this book Root uses analogies and excerpts from such films as About a Boy, Good Will Hunting, Little Miss Sunshine, Freedom Writers, and I Heart Huckabees.

The subtitle of the book is “Help for youth workers, volunteers, and parents on creating authentic relationships. “

I would love to have my parents and volunteers read this book and discuss together how we can implement Root’s ideas about what real incarnational ministry can and should resemble in our lives and community.

Enough of the introduction…let me provide a brief overview and synopsis of the content.

Root begins from a place within.  His own experiences (both as a husband and youth leader) lead him to question the methods and beliefs commonly ascribed to by many in youth ministry.  He came to the conclusion that his approach to youth ministry was that of influence.  His goal had been to build relationships with students so to influence them towards some end. He writes, “but my desire to influence them was keeping me from really being with them-in a truly relational way.”

He further confesses, “We cared more about getting them saved, baptized, confirmed, or involved in positive activities than about being truly with them in the deepest joys and sufferings of their lives.”

Rather then entering into their lives, he had simplified his role to “fixing” students.  Of course, the problem is that students are smart and savvy, and see straight through that, dont’ they?

As youth workers, we may think that having an agenda for our students is a good and necessary thing, especially if the agenda is to lead them to Christ.  Once again, the problem arises when our students don’t agree that the agenda is such a good thing, thus spoiling or preventing relationships to deepen.

Root continues by making a strong case why relational youth ministry cannot be about influence.  Without giving away too much, a basic premise is that we cannot act or be perceived as sales reps for God and salvation.  No one likes people who attempt to start a friendship with you, only to then try to sell you on a business pitch.  Anyone been in that situation before? As adults, we see through that and often end up resenting those “friends”, so why would our students think differently of us if that becomes our approach?

Root asks a bold question to youth workers, “Do we have a ‘point’ going into a relationship that dictates the direction of the relationship and overshadows our ability to truly be with and for a young person, learning real need?”

Ouch!

Andrew believes, and rightly so, that relationships in ministry are not pathways to quick decisions. Rather, they are invitations to share life (all of life, its good and bad) together.   “At its core, relational youth ministry is about being with students in the midst of the all-too-common (and tragic) feeling of being alone. “

Root moves on  to examine the life and writings of Dietrich Bonhoeffer (whom I love) to help further understand relational youth ministry as place sharing.  He really develops this theme in his first book, and if you are a Bonhoeffer fan, you should read it.

Place sharing means “to suffer with” and “stand in” for the full person of the adolescent.  It was and is what Jesus does for humanity.  It is represented as community in the essence of the Trinity.  Root spends a few chapters diving in theologically and showing how place sharing fits into the nature and role of Christ as Incarnate, Crucified, and Resurrected.

Incarnate

To be incarnate in youth ministry has little to do with magnetism, little to do with your ability to attract adolescents with your aura of cool. But is has everything to do with gently entering the lives of adolescents as we invite them to enter our own.”  That is what Root calls authentic place sharing.

The incarnation claims that God is among is, God is with us, and God is for us. It proclaims we are free– free to be human, free to love one another, and free to love God as God made us, human.”

Crucified

Since our world is full of brokenness and suffering, the fact that Jesus entered into human history and experienced pain and death can give us hope.  Bonhoeffer wrote “Only a suffering God can help.”  Youth ministry is not about fixing students suffering, but about being brave enough to see it and live with it in hope; to see it, to name it, and then to respectfully enter it and to share in their journeys.

“When suffering is shared, often its power to strangle is broken.  The power of suffering to determine our destiny is broken when suffering is shared in relationships.”

Resurrected

“Relational ministry in the shape of the resurrected Christ is to live and love in the now”  This enables us and our students to live fully present in this world, but also to have hope.  ”What makes us different from non-Christians is that we live fully in a fallen world of death and loss and nevertheless hope in God’s promises won and witnessed in the resurrection of Jesus Christ.”  Our job, as youth workers, is to hope with them as we suffer with them.” What a great statement!

“When we assert that God is present in Jesus Christ in relationship (not in where we take the relationship), we are free, because God’s presence is not dependent upon us- it’s already a reality.

“Our call is simply to be with youth, to share their place, to see them as they are as we invite them to see us as we are, and is so doing confess that Jesus is present between and with us. We don’t have to do or be anything other than our authentic human selves.”

In order to truly be human, we must be both real and open with students, as well as closed when necessary.  We put our lives on display, but in a real way that fits into our personality, family, and basic realities of existence.  Let’s be honest, being open and available to students 24-7 is not healthy or realistic, yet why do so many new youth pastors attempt to do that?

What are we saying about the value of rest, privacy, family, and our own interests?  We need to be ourselves and share that authenticity with our students.  They will respect us more for it in the long run, and ultimately the lessons we exemplify will be far more sustainable.

Root concludes with some practical approaches and ideas depicting what place sharing might look like in your ministry context. I especially appreciated the story about a small group of leaders and students who meet at a church.  As often happens, the students seemed disengaged and hyper active. Yet, when the time came for group prayer, the students shared personal requests and prayed for each other with sincerity.

Root writes, “There in that nondescript room that lacked flat-screen TV’s, video projectors, and a platform stage that the leadership seemed to covet as marks of success and relevance, adults were sprinkled throughout, sitting with kids, touching and smiling at those who spoke, nodding with them as they expressed their fears and brokenness into the life of the community.”

To me, that is youth ministry at its core.  It’s not about what we have to offer, it’s about entering fully into the real lives of real students.  Here in the northeast, we do youth ministry out of what we have, not what we want.  I am glad Andrew shared this particular story as a hallmark of success, because in many viewpoints (by comparison) no one would take notice of that small raggamuffin group of people sharing life together.

I will conclude my review with some key concepts and a few final statements that spoke into my heart and ministry.

Practical Actions for Youth Workers:

Be a relational matchmaker

recruit and serve volunteer leaders

communicate with parents

share the vision

pass on the faith through doubt and struggle

include students in your life

A section that especially challenged me to critically think about my own youth ministry was a set of questions proposed.

Root articulates that if our ministry is about personal influence, then these are the type of questions we are focussed on:

How can we get kids to come?     How can we do the most cutting edge ministry?   How can I do a good job and be esteemed?

However, if we are able to shift from a ministry of influence towards a ministry of place sharing, the questions shift from “How” to “Who”

Who are these young people and what is impacting them?  Who I am alongside them?  Who is this God we serve, and who is God calling us to be and be with?

Personal Reflections:

These questions left my mind spinning, as I contemplated my ministry and realized just how often I ask myself and leaders the first set of questions, and how seldom I am asking the second set.   Relational youth ministry is not easy.  It is easy trying to “fix” my students and make them believe and behave the right way. That way, I can show them off to the elders of my church and don’t have to deal with the drama and struggles of teen life.

However, true youth ministry means getting involved in the mess and not avoiding or ignoring it.

Is it easier to look the other way?  Yes.

It is more presentable and manageable to not have the addicted, abused, and depressed in your group?  Of course.

Let’s face it, they often complicate things.  But isn’t that how real life is anyways?  No one has it together, and to promote that kind of message to today’s students, I think does more harm than good.  Yes, Jesus can and does heal our brokenness and we should celebrate that when it happens, but it usually does not happen overnight.

After I read this book I uttered a simple prayer that God would stir my heart and make me more sensitive and compassionate to students in need. I don’t want my youth group to be a place where students feel they have to hide their doubts, anger, and issues.

Just this week, a girl opened up in our small group about cutting herself and contemplating suicide, another stood in court to testify to sexual abuse in her family, another is battling sexual addiction, one is threatening to overdose on pills, and the list goes on.  Just last night, a number of students opened up about major issues going on at home.  Tears were being poured out like offerings and I witnessed other students (who have gone through similar struggles) rise up and pray for those in need.  It was truly a magnificent and powerful occasion.

In years past, I would have almost prayed that these students simply not show up each week (problem solved).  Now, I want these students in my group. I want to hear their stories and enter in their pain.  I want to pray with and for them and to give them hope.  I prayed just the other week that God would give me more compassion  and opportunities to enter into the lives of students.  Be careful what you pray for!

My prayer is that my life and ministry will celebrate brokenness and hurting students and I will not run away from issues, rather enter into them with compassion, faith, hope, and love.

Everybody Hurts (for web)





$5 Training recap

9 10 2009

This past weekend, Chris Folmsbee traveled from Kansas City to Bedford NY.  We had the priviledge of hosting the $5 Training from Barefoot Ministries.

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Chris is the author of A New Kind of Youth Ministry and upcoming book Story, Signs and Sacred Rhythms: A Narrative Approach to Youth Ministry.  He has traveled the world, speaking and training youth pastors and youth workers.  He has spoken to 5,000 people at conventions and lead this same training for  hundreds in packed churches.  Yet, here he was coming to the northeast, to the small and sleepy village of Bedford Hills, NY to help struggling youth workers and volunteers better understand why we do what we do.

Since there is relatively little youth ministry culture in the northeast (not to mention the overwhelmingly busy and chaotic schedules everyone has) it is honestly difficult to promote anything having to do with youth ministry in these parts.  Perhaps it is similar where you live and work.  Conversely, I spoke with a youth pastor from Texas who said, “I could spit in the middle of a field, put a tent over it and call it a youth event, and get 200 students to show up.”

Chris came and interacted and engaged with our small and intimate gathering.  He seemed to thrive in the atmosphere, as he was able to have one-on-one conversations with every youth worker, volunteer, and parent in attendance.    I was able to have a good number of my team there, and the training was a perfect way to us to learn and grow together. Much of the ideas presented we have been working hard to implement, and so the training was an encouraging affirmation of the direction we are moving in.  It was great for my leaders look up and realize “Now I understand why we made that change” or ” Our curriculum and lessons really do work together towards the spiritual formation of our students.”

The training was perfect for parents as well.  Five of my leaders have students in the group and the material offered really helped them not only better understand the importance of youth ministry and their children, but better understand the  processes that students go through as they develope spiritually.

The training and content was also perfect for our area.  Most youth ministry “experts” don’t get the northeast.  There are many cultural factors here that make ministry frustrating and difficult, and 9 times out of 10, the books being written and training offered just does not translate to my experience here in NY.   Barefoot’s training and trainers seem to understand the dynamics at work.  It helps that someone like Chris grew up for a while in NY and was a youth pastor here for a few years.  Barefoot is also promoting and encouraging youth workers from our area to speak out and have a voice and they are willing to speak into our context and not just avoid it or disregard it like so many others.

A few of the factors that characterize this particular are that the vast majority of youth workers are unpaid and untrained.  Most youth workers here (even the paid ones) have never read a youth ministry book or attended a big conference.  Many volunteers are adults, who struggle to find the time and the balance between being a parent and, at the same time, being the church’s answer to the youth “problem”.

Morever, the effects of postmodernity and its ideologies have already permeated the schools and communities and anything to do with “religion” is not greeted warmly and looked down upon in many circles.  While there is a great history of Christianity and religious revivals, they are distant memories that in no way shape the current situation. These are just a few of the challenges facing us here, and so we need people to speak on our behalf and people to speak into our realities.  I think Barefoot has the ability to do that in the months and years to come.

Without giving away too much of the content, here are some key concepts presented in the $5 training:

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Discipleship: Shaping Students for the Mission of God

This seminar will look at the key elements of the mission of God, foundational aspects of discipleship and a practical outline in which to guide students to engage in life-long spiritual discovery and growth.

Leadership 101: 10 Essentials for Developing Healthy Teams

Healthy teams are the backbone of successful youth ministries. God has called each of us to use our gifts and passions to contribute to something that is greater than ourselves – the mission of God. Discover 10 essentials for developing healthy teams that accomplish more than we could ever do on our own!

Engaging Parents: Keys to Helping Students Develop an Authentic Faith

It is widely known that parents are the primary influence in a teenager’s life. This seminar will look at how we can involve and encourage parents toward developing an authentic faith in the lives of their children. This seminar will look at the critical journey of faith and the three roles a parent can play to guide their children through their spiritual journey.

Discipleship is about shaping students for the Mission of God.  The redemptove storyline of the Bible is God’s plan to restore humanity to wholeness and complete harmony.  To understand the nature of God’s mission, it is vital to understand the Biblical text, your particular faith community, and your specific cultural context.

Some essentials for developing healthy teams include being a community first, open, honest, and truthful relationships, being able to listen, celebrate, and pray together.

Some keys to helping students develope an authentic faith is understanding the faith formation process and allowing for questioning, confusion, encounter, perplexity, etc..during the informative years.

Both parents and youth leader function at various times as Advisor, Advocate, and Guide and “youth ministry end only when the relationships cease to exist”.

What I appreciated the most about Barefoot’s training are 3 things:

1) The kindness and care of their leadership and trainers- they really took an interest in our church and our area.

2) The focus on theology, philosophy, and ideology behind youth ministry.  This was not a workshop on how to promote you group better or run sweeter games.  The material looks critically at the Scriptures and the Story of God and how the theology of the incarnation and mission of God should be what drives our youth ministries.  There was more theology and Biblical interpretation and contextualiztion offered in this training than any other youth ministry training I have attended, but it was done in communal and conversational way that promoted questions and discussions.

3) The price.  For the same cost as one of those 5 dollar footlongs at your local Subway, I was able to bring almost my entire leadership team for a day of training, inspiration, and support alongside other youth workers from our area.

subway

My wife always says, “you get what you paid for”, usually in reference to the discounted garbage bags I buy that fall part once you put anything but paper in!  But don’t let the low cost fool you.  The content, structure, and materials offered (including a flash drive containing the content and slides) rivals (if not tops) the other one-day training events offered.  I have been to them all, and Barefoot offers one of the best at a rate that every church can afford to send people to.

I realize that locations could be problematic.  We were the only church in the northeast hosting, and only one of eight in the U.S.  But I know that Barefoot has received huge response already from churches willing and wanting to host next year. If you are one of them, check out the website and get info about hosting one in your region.  Readers and friends across the pond in the U.K, I am not sure what the plans for expansion are, but it is worth looking into as well.

Barefoot Ministries is also producing some excellent training materials and curriculum that can be used for Student education (sunday school), small groups, Bible studies, and even youth lessons.

“Barefoot exists to provide youth workers with effective ministry tools and resources. Our deepest desire is to partner with you in guiding students into spiritual formation for the mission of God.

Through youth ministry training, books, media, curriculum, magazines, web-based resources and a growing number of resources in development, Barefoot is committed to walking along side of you with practical resources and training as you serve the students and families in your church and community.”

Barefoot Ministries

Check out the link above if you are searching for some quality materials and content that you can adapt to fit your particular group of students and needs.

Barefoot Ministries





My top 5 list for youth workers

5 10 2009

As I meet new youth workers in my area, I am often asked the question “What books or resources do you recommend?”  My thoughts have changed over the years, but having read most youth ministry books out there, I have come to some decisions.  Granted, every youth worker is different and so is every context .  These are the five books I would recommend a new youth worker read and, in fact, I have given this list to my former interns who are now in full-time youth ministry.

(There are other non Youth Ministry books I highly recommend as far as theology, personal and spiritual development, church ministry, etc…, but this list is primarily about progressive and innovative youth ministry ideas, philosophies, and content that I have personally found to be the most helpful and inspirational in my situation)

I have posted a page on my blog with a more complete list of recommended books, but I chose to keep this list limited to five so not to overwhelm someone.  All of the books are fairly short and easy reads, and my advise is to read one book a month and really digest it.  After six months, you should have a good understanding of new models and thoughts for an every-changing youth ministry)

Each book speaks into different aspects of youth ministry including relational approaches, spiritual development, philosophical/theological perspectives, cultural/worldview changes and implications, and new ministry models.  I have written some reviews of these, which you can find by searching the blog, and intend to have a review written on each book shortly.

In no particular order:

A New Kind of Youth Ministry- Chris Folmsbee

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An excellent book about re-culturing forms and structure of traditional youth ministry models such as evangelism, disciple ship, leadership, missions, etc..

“A New Kind of Youth Ministry should be the handbook for a generation of forward-thinking youth workers.” – Tony Jones

Youth Ministry 3.0- Mark Oestreicher

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Marko realizes that the way we have been doing things is already not working. This book looks back historical to the major shifts in youth ministry while attempting to create a third way- new approach in ministering contextually and cross-culturally to new generations of students.

“This book will inspire, equip, and challenge you with an extremely thoughtful and realistic approach to youth ministry for the 3.0 orbs we find ourselves in.” -Chris Folmsbee

Postmodern Youth Ministry- Tony Jones

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Probably the first book published that researched the effects of postmodernity on students and attempted to re-think what youth ministry needed to look like.  Eight years after publication, it is still probably the best book out there on the issues and countless people are finding encouragement as they realize the inevitable influence on postmodernity in their own contexts.

Presence-Centered Youth Ministry- Mike King

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This book sets the bar for creating a theological and historical foundation for God’s presence in youth ministry.  The book shows how classic disciplines, symbols, and practices can shape the worldviews, virtues, and habits of young people today.    “If Brother Lawrence had been a youth pastor, this book would have been his favorite resource.” - Kendra Dean

Relationships Unfiltered- Andrew Root

relationships unfiltered

Andrew Root challenges youth workers to reconsider our motives for relational youth ministry and begin to consider simply being with and dong life alongside teenagers with no agenda other than to love them right where they are, by place sharing.  ”Relationships Unfiltered is the single most important youth ministry book in a generation. ” -Tony Jones





Contemplative Youth Ministry- by Mark Yaconelli

28 09 2009

Contemplative Youth Ministry

I must admit that I was a bit skeptical prior to reading this book.   However, after reading through the book for a second time, it has become one of my favorite youth ministry books.  Mark Yaconelli has a witty and authentic way of storytelling and teaching how to help students practice the presence of Jesus. I appreciate his journey; his mistakes, failures, lessons learned, and advice he has to offer all of us attempting (and praying) to see our students grow spiritually.

Central to this book is the theme of presence.  The author shares that the central problem in sharing the Christian faith with young people is this:

We don’t know how to be with our kids.

We don’t know how to be with ourselves.

We don’t know how to be with God.

But if we look to the life of Jesus as our example and inspiration, we find that Jesus enjoys being with people and being with God.  ”His ministry doesn’t come from a pre-planned formula but instead arises in response to the real situations and relationships he encounters.”

To be “present” with our students means relating to youth in the way Jesus related to people…with authenticity and transparency.

The idea of “contemplation” means being with God within the reality of the present moment.  As Mark explains, “it’s about attentiveness–opening our eyes to God, ourselves, and others.”

Ignatious of Loyola referred to contemplation as “seeing God in all things.”  Brother Lawrence called it” the pure loving gaze that finds God everywhere.”  Teresa of Avila referred to this experience as “Awareness absorbed and amazed.”

One of the questions asked in the book really spoke to me.  ”What is my deepest hope for the youth I know?”

As I prayed and thought through this, I could sense and feel the way God sees and loves my students.  I began viewing them through God’s eyes and not through my own agendas for them.

I especially appreciated the section dealing with being transparent and vulnerable before our students. Often, the assumption is that as youth leaders we must live above our students and, without realizing it, a certain level of disconnect and unapproachability inevitably creeps in.  Mark writes (and I agree) that youth want to know about our marriages or romantic lives.  They want to meet our friends and find out what we do when not in church.  They want to know what makes us angry and whether we agree or disagree with their parents.

They want to know how to live well and live fully human, and they need us as real examples that they can relate to.

Probably my favorite chapter is entitled “Becoming a Good Listener” simply because I struggle with this approach and quite frankly needed a healthy dose of inspiration and challenge.

The first part of this approach is learning how to surrender.  ”We need to stop trying to make kids love God…to surrender means to recognize that we don’t control how God lives and moves. We don’t control our churches and we certainly don’t control the spiritual lives of our young people.”

As youth leaders, we need to be able to trust that our students belong to God; that God has been seeking to love them since before they were born and will continue to love them long after they leave the influence of our ministries.  This concept is revolutionary to me and freeing in the same breath.

We also need to receive from God, and place our students in positions to receive from Him as well.  ”When we allow ourselves to be open and receptive to God’s love and presence, we begin to notice that God is alive and available.”

Mark provides a great chart comparing/contrasting the different ways we approach youth ministry when we’re rooted in anxiety rather than love.  Interestingly enough, I was able to use the same descriptions and characteristics and compare “traditional” to “emerging” youth ministry approaches .  In many ways, traditional youth ministry is based upon anxiety (control, professionals, products, results, conformity, activity, and answers).  Contrary, emerging youth ministries demonstrate and implement contemplation, processes, presences, guides, relationships, creativity, awareness, and questions.

This chart forced me to critically reflect upon my youth ministry and see how we have been operating in the past:  out of anxiety or love?

The next big section offers different ways to enter into the presence of God. Most are rooted in ancient Christianity and have been transformative for centuries.  Now, I have been doing a number of these for some time, but each process would be powerful if we can find ways to implement them into our youth ministries and model them for our students.

They include: Lectio Divina (holy reading, Centering Prayer (indwelling Christ), The Awareness Examen, Silent Prayer, Creative Arts prayer

By far, the best chapter for me (and I think one of the best chapters in all youth ministry books to date) is “Being with young people”

Being human is “seeing and being seen, hearing and being heard, being moved by others and allowing others to be moved by us, responding with acts of kindness and receiving acts of kindness, and embodying a sense of delight in all our interactions.”  In many ways, author and professor Andrew Root picks up on this theme and wonderfully runs with it in his books Revisiting Relational Youth Ministry and Relationships Unfiltered.

Seeing

We love young people when we see them with the eyes of Jesus; seeing them as they are, not as the culture judges them to be or as we wish them to be.

Yaconelli shares a wonderful story about being on a youth retreat with a particularly terrible bunch of students (haven’t we all had that experience before!)  He became angry and yelled at them and demanded that the fun stop and they all go to bed.  Feeling bad about the way he treated them he got up and walked around the sanctuary where they were sleeping.  Watching them, he began to notice their innocence and remembered their pain and hurt. His anger at them was transformed into compassion for them as he began to see them with the eyes of Christ.

Hearing

We also need to listen; to open our ears to the words and feelings youth speak.  As a youth pastor, I often feel the need (and desire) to speak.  Even when students are unloading their problems and issues, I fight the urge to interrupt with my sound advise. Most of our activities at youth group are designed to help students sit and listen to us. But imagine if we could turn that around and listen to them.  “Its almost a conversion experience in this day and age to be authentically heard by another person.”  I couldn’t agree more.

I debated whether to share this story or not, but here goes.

A few years back I had the priviledge of attending a course on Postmodernity and the Emergent Church taught at Alliance Theological Seminary by Tony Jones.  I had met Tony briefly on a few occasions and we planned to spend some time together after class.  I will never forget the time, attention, and care he gave me while the two of us sat and chatted at an Irish pub in Nyack.  He asked questions like he actually cared about my life and he listened.  He could have talked about his experiences, his writings, his theology..and I would have listened and loved it. But instead, the whole evening was about me.  And the timing was perfect because I had issues that I really needed to talk about with someone, but no one (up to that point) had thought to ask.  I finally felt free to share with someone who would not judge and had no self interest.  My respect and appreciation for Tony grew that night and I left feeling such a weight lifted.

I want to be that kind of friend, mentor, and youth pastor to students.

“Christians, especially ministers, so often think they must always contribute something when they are in the company of others. They forget that listening can be a greater service than speaking. Many people are looking for an ear that will listen.  They person who can no longer listen to others will soon be no longer listening to God either.” -Dietrich Bonhoeffer

Action with Kindness

These are moments in which we embody the love of God.  This love of God “is often more powerful and transformative in small acts of love than in the lights, energy, and charisma of large outreach events.”

We need to take time to experience the everyday moments of life together with our students.  These can occur over simple meals, while driving or shopping, watching a game together, etc..

Before reading this book I associated contemplation with being still…perhaps a monk in isolation in a cave somewhere!

Parker Palmer debunks that thought and writes the following: “At root, contemplation and action are the same. As our youth ministry becomes infused with contemplative prayer and awareness, the effect is not more prayer and silence; instead, what begins to emerge is authentic action. Activities within the youth ministry no longer are chosen frantically from resource books; they no longer are prescribed from the outside.  Instead, as we widen our awareness, our actions with youth become more guided by their needs and the movement of the Holy Spirit.  Being prayerfully present to kids enlarges our capacity to act out of love rather than anxiety. Contemplative awareness nurtures our creativity and draws us to act from the heart. We find ourselves responding more and reacting less.”

Delight

As youth pastors, we should be amazed and delighted by students.  I have found that even though dealing with middle school antics and high school drama can be taxing, there is no greater joy than seeing young people “get it”.  I have more fun with students than with any other age group.  It is fun and a delight to be around them, and I feel blessed to be a part of that on a daily basis.  I know that if and when God leads me to do something else, I will always miss the joy I experience when with young people.

Jean Vanier writes that love is “to reveal the beauty of another person to themselves.”  When students are seen, they feel valued.  When they are heard, they feel respected.  When someone is moved by their situation, they feel loved.  And when others delight in their existence, they sense the very breath of God!

“Youth Ministry is about holding up a young person’s deepest identity until he or she is able to see it too.”

The last major section of the book developes a process of recruiting and training a community around you to serve the youth. Mark calls this a “covenant community” and he outlines some pretty complex and detailed steps to help build up your volunteer leadership team. Now, it is hard to deny the results he shares, but the six steps seem a bit much to me.  However, if you follow them I am sure you can double your team with solid volunteers.

A good point that he makes that we all need to be aware of is this:  You’re not just looking for a warm body, you’re seeking people who sense that their participation in ministry is intimately connected to God’s movement in their lives.   Secondly, when people spend time in prayer and relationship building, the ministry becomes a great source of nourishment; people enjoy the ministry, serve with great authenticity, and stay involved longer.

Another great thought found in this book is the idea that youth ministry is truly a calling and blessing at the same time.  For many of us, we need to be doing youth ministry.  We need to be with and for our students, because by doing so, we connect with God.  Mark writes to all of us youth leaders that perhaps we are more pliable among these youth, more open to God shaking us up or offering us a word of healing. maybe youth ministry is our spiritual discipline.

“It’s not just a place where we serve, it’s a place where we are transformed, healed, and made new.”

Below are a few more helpful and inspiring quotes I discovered.

“It’s this movement from prayer to presence–from being open and available to God to being transparent and accessible before teens-that is the real work of ministry.”

“Our first task as youth ministers is to be with young people just as Jesus was with people.  Our second task is to help youth develop the eyes, ears, and heart of Jesus for themselves.  We’re not only called to be witnesses among young people, we are also called, like Jesus, to be teachers. We’re called to awaken youth to the presence of God in the world.

To help do this we 1) point 2) question 3) invite 4) we create circumstances

All of this takes patience and time.  Faith takes time and we need to stick around long enough to see it go through its ups and downs, highs and lows, and eventually develope, mature, and blossom.

“Our role is to help youth recognize the ways in which Jesus is already near, already seeking trust and friendship.”

“An efficiently busy life is “more potentially destructive of spiritual growth than debauchery or alcohol or drugs.”

“The purpose of integrating contemplative presence in youth ministry is not to turn kids into monks, it is to deepen our awareness of god, others, and self so that we might become fully alive!”

“Through greater prayer and presence, we notice the moments of connection between youth and God and try to build our programs accordingly.”





Shift #7: From Facts to Experience/Encounter

15 09 2009

“It is circumstances, not ideas, that change people.” author and Catholic priest Richard Rohr

Possibly the most significant way we can help youth notice their experiences with God is by helping them engage in real life; in real-life situations (out of the church and class room). We can then ask  them the eye-opening question- “How is God present here?

I once heard this statement:  ”Facts don’t change people.  Experiences change people.”

Now, thinking back to the  Gospels and the book of Acts and the beginnings of the early church, you realize that it was individual’s encounters with the person of Jesus that transformed their life, not necessarily what they believed about him.  In fact, on more than once occasion Jesus healed someone and/or brought deliverance and restoration prior to any theological assent regarding his identity.

Here is a great story taken from the Gospel of John and serves as only one of many like it.

John 9

Jesus Heals a Man Born Blind

1As he went along, he saw a man blind from birth. 2His disciples asked him, “Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?”

3“Neither this man nor his parents sinned,” said Jesus, “but this happened so that the work of God might be displayed in his life. 4As long as it is day, we must do the work of him who sent me. Night is coming, when no one can work. 5While I am in the world, I am the light of the world.”

6Having said this, he spit on the ground, made some mud with the saliva, and put it on the man’s eyes. 7“Go,” he told him, “wash in the Pool of Siloam” (this word means Sent). So the man went and washed, and came home seeing.

8His neighbors and those who had formerly seen him begging asked, “Isn’t this the same man who used to sit and beg?” 9Some claimed that he was.
Others said, “No, he only looks like him.”
But he himself insisted, “I am the man.”

10“How then were your eyes opened?” they demanded.

11He replied, “The man they call Jesus made some mud and put it on my eyes. He told me to go to Siloam and wash. So I went and washed, and then I could see.”

12“Where is this man?” they asked him.
“I don’t know,” he said.

13They brought to the Pharisees the man who had been blind. 14Now the day on which Jesus had made the mud and opened the man’s eyes was a Sabbath.15Therefore the Pharisees also asked him how he had received his sight. “He put mud on my eyes,” the man replied, “and I washed, and now I see.”

16Some of the Pharisees said, “This man is not from God, for he does not keep the Sabbath.”
But others asked, “How can a sinner do such miraculous signs?” So they were divided.

17Finally they turned again to the blind man, “What have you to say about him? It was your eyes he opened.”
The man replied, “He is a prophet.”

18The Jews still did not believe that he had been blind and had received his sight until they sent for the man’s parents. 19“Is this your son?” they asked. “Is this the one you say was born blind? How is it that now he can see?”

20“We know he is our son,” the parents answered, “and we know he was born blind. 21But how he can see now, or who opened his eyes, we don’t know. Ask him. He is of age; he will speak for himself.” 22His parents said this because they were afraid of the Jews, for already the Jews had decided that anyone who acknowledged that Jesus was the Christ would be put out of the synagogue. 23That was why his parents said, “He is of age; ask him.”

24A second time they summoned the man who had been blind. “Give glory to God,” they said. “We know this man is a sinner.”

25He replied, “Whether he is a sinner or not, I don’t know. One thing I do know. I was blind but now I see!”

26Then they asked him, “What did he do to you? How did he open your eyes?”

27He answered, “I have told you already and you did not listen. Why do you want to hear it again? Do you want to become his disciples, too?”

28Then they hurled insults at him and said, “You are this fellow’s disciple! We are disciples of Moses! 29We know that God spoke to Moses, but as for this fellow, we don’t even know where he comes from.”

30The man answered, “Now that is remarkable! You don’t know where he comes from, yet he opened my eyes. 31We know that God does not listen to sinners. He listens to the godly man who does his will. 32Nobody has ever heard of opening the eyes of a man born blind. 33If this man were not from God, he could do nothing.”

34To this they replied, “You were steeped in sin at birth; how dare you lecture us!” And they threw him out.

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What is apparent from this story is that the Pharisees were trying to trap Jesus, pin him down, and squeeze him into a particular theological box.  The blind man probably figured that Jesus was a prophet of some kind and perhaps gave his specific answer out of fear of the Pharisees.  Or perhaps, he really didn’t have many facts or beliefs about this man called Jesus, but he certainly knew what he just experienced. He was literally blind and now he could see, and this man named Jesus healed him!

I think in youth ministry what often happens is that we try to get students to believe certain things about Jesus before we really enable them to encounter him.  Maybe the encounter is what must predicate the belief.

In Youth Ministry 3.0, Marko uses a great analogy of a train to illustrate the difference of progression towards faith, and (ultimately) the importance of fact vs. faith.

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Marko argues that in the past, facts could drive the engine of personal belief.  These “facts” would lead to a faith that was based upon those “facts”.  Experience could be helpful, but often not necessary and often declared they would get in way of true and authentic faith.  Now I understand what the writer of Hebrews says, 1Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see. 2This is what the ancients were commended for.”

It is true that if God were to audibly speak or perform wonders and signs all the time in front of my students, it would not take a deep faith to believe in him.  So, the less amount of experiences we have, the potential is there to develop a stronger type of faith. However, a faith built solely upon facts may not be standing on solid ground.

Here is why.

Which “facts” are included as essential and who makes that call?  What if some beliefs or ideas that were considered “facts” a few generations ago are no longer held in the same light as they once were?

Imagine building a faith on the “fact” that the earth was flat and at the center of the universe?  Oh wait, most Christians did that a few centuries ago and excommunicated those who believed otherwise as heretics.

What if we are building our faith today on facts that may or may not be credible? What happens when one of those ideas comes crashing down?  In this book Velvet Elvis, Rob Bell uses the analogy of building your faith just based upon facts and likens it to building a wall of bricks.

Two things occur when Christians do this:

1) We spend a whole lot of time defending our wall, protecting it from bricks that do not belong, and trying to keep people outside (that’s what walls do)

2)  We open up the possibility of the entire wall crumbling down if one of the bricks happens to be pulled out or damaged. (kind of like that game Jenga)

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Now, here is what I am not saying…Facts do not matter. They do. They are important . They are essential,

The apostle Paul writes this in 1 Corinthians 14:12-14

12But if it is preached that Christ has been raised from the dead, how can some of you say that there is no resurrection of the dead? 13If there is no resurrection of the dead, then not even Christ has been raised. 14And if Christ has not been raised, our preaching is useless and so is your faith.”

So clearly, a faith built upon myths or false ideas that cannot be historical and factually proven is not going to last.  There would be no real power in that kind of faith.  The life, death, and resurrection of Christ is essential according to the apostles, as is his divinity and humanity.

One of the earlier statements of “facts” and theology believed by the early church was this:

6Who, being in very nature  God,
did not consider equality with God something to be grasped,
7but made himself nothing,
taking the very nature of a servant,
being made in human likeness.
8And being found in appearance as a man,
he humbled himself
and became obedient to death—
even death on a cross!
9Therefore God exalted him to the highest place
and gave him the name that is above every name,
10that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow,
in heaven and on earth and under the earth,
11and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord,
to the glory of God the Father.     -Philippians 2

15He is the image of the invisible God, the firstborn over all creation. 16For by him all things were created: things in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or powers or rulers or authorities; all things were created by him and for him. 17He is before all things, and in him all things hold together. 18And he is the head of the body, the church; he is the beginning and the firstborn from among the dead, so that in everything he might have the supremacy. 19For God was pleased to have all his fullness dwell in him, 20and through him to reconcile to himself all things, whether things on earth or things in heaven, by making peace through his blood, shed on the cross.   – Colossians 1:15-20

These appear to be some of the earliest doctrines recorded in Scripture and clearly what we can, and should, build our beliefs upon.   Beyond these, I am just not sure what exactly is essential and what is not, and therefore constructing and communicating a faith built or driven by a whole host of “facts” can become potentially dangerous.

And you know that’s true when we see our high school students enter college and told that many of these “facts” don’t exist (whether true or not).  We watch as their faith begins to crumble under the weight of doubt and uncertainty.  Now, we can try to give them new books on apologetics and thus begins a battle for their minds- beliefs about something and someone.

But…. if their hearts are already won because of their personal experience with the transforming and freeing power of Jesus…well that is a different story.

Back to the illustration of the train.  If experience/encounter lead the way, these cannot be easily discredited. One of the so-called ideals of postmodernity is that personal experience is everything. You will hear statements such as this, “Well that may be true for you, but this is what is true for me.”  Now this can be both a blessing and curse at the same time. Traditional apologetics don’t work in this scenario very often.  Sure, you will have exceptions, but it is very hard to “prove your point” to someone from a purely intellectual and rationalistic approach.

You can say 2+2 =4 and someone can say, “I see how you can come to belief that, but for me that equation does not work”.

Right or wrong, this is our generation of students. We can try to change them back into older worldviews, but we will spend energy fighting a losing battle and over time frustration will set in like trying to swim upstream against the current.    They have been taught (not modeled) a faith based mostly upon facts, and often these facts can be and should be questioned.  Some “facts” are Biblically based, while many are more products of culture and particular western worldviews than anything else.

What if God is calling us to reach students where they are at? (whether we understand or agree with the way they see life)

What if youth leaders focus on bringing students into a relationship with the person of Jesus. These “God-experiences” can broaden their perspectives on the spiritual,  and through the presence of the Holy Spirit, can lead to a personal faith.  This personal faith can and should lead to a desire to know more about the person of Jesus (which is built upon a core set of beliefs and “facts”).  Again, these are important, but maybe not what needs to drive our approach anymore.

Students still have questions that need to be answered. But for this generation, these questions are no longer about the credibility of the Bible and manuscripts, etc..  Sure some historical questions will arise from Dan Brown books and they can and should be addressed, but the issues students question have more to do with heart-felt concerns than purely academic or intellectual curiosity.

They are asking questions such:

Why does God allow suffering in the world?

How could a loving God send people to Hell?

Why isn’t Christianity more inclusive?

How can one religion be “right” and the others “wrong”?

Why have so many wars been fought in the name of God?

I am grateful for new approaches in apologetics such as Tim Keller who uses human reason and questions and uses these legitimate questions and concerns to point people to the reality and truth of God.

Generally, I have steered away from traditional apologetics, believing that Christ needs to be promoted more than defended. One author of the book iLead writes, “thoughtful apologetics are essential for reaching post-Christian, American teens.”   For starters, postmodern students are all about personal experience. call it what you want, but it is not going to change.  So if you want factual knowledge and evidence that demands a verdict to really appeal, you are going to have to start looking at some other generation.

I suppose arguments such as those advocated by Tim Keller, C.S. Lewis, and Ravi Zacharias are beneficial for students thinking about truth, philosophy, and the like.  However, in my experience, most teens are drawn to the experience and encounter of Christ.  As the author later states, “until our teens can see that Christ quenches their souls’ spiritual thirst more than the world, they will always pursue idols to their own harm.”  Therefore, as youth leaders we must unapologetically promote Jesus and allow His very life and nature to be on display in and through us.  To me, that is the living Word of God in action.

What drives and motivates students today?

Not facts. Not anymore.

They are bombarded with facts.  It is experiences that they want.  That appears to be the way this generation of students understand, process, and relate to life.

Who can blame them for wanting a concrete encounter with the transcendant God and not just a bunch of ancient ideas and texts, that (in reality) speak very little into their cultural context at first glance.

Today’s youth  long for and embrace experience.  They dream and desire deep encounter; with one another and with the transcendant and spiritual.

Isn’t that what Jesus offered?

His followers knew him. They met him. They encountered him and he changed their life.

Students believe what they see, feel, hear, taste, and touch.  They believe what they experience.

I believe that our God is one who wants us to experience him. To taste and see that the Lord is good.

As culture, society, and students evolve and change, let’s shift our approach from facts to experience and encounter; towards introducing our students to this person who can open their eyes, heal their brokenness, restore them to God, and give them a hope and a future.

The train is moving.  Will we be watching it pass, shoveling coal in the back, or at the controls excited for the adventure?

obama-high-speed-rail-plans





5 Dollar Training

11 09 2009

                                                                                                                          picture-5

 

This fall (Saturday October 3), BCC has the honor of hosting Barefoot Ministries  $5.00 youth leader training. We are one of 8 host churches in the nation and will be representing the greater NYC metro area and the North East. For more information, check out the link below.  

5 dollar training

Here is a letter from Matt Wilks and Chris Folmsbee, two of the trainers for the day and now on staff with Barefoot Ministries.

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Greetings!

Since its beginning in 2001, Barefoot Ministries has worked to serve churches around the world by publishing resources that help guide students into spiritual formation for the mission of God.  In addition to publishing resources for youth workers, Barefoot will be providing youth ministry training that will strengthen this core focus.

Beginning this fall, we will be in 12 cities in North America – 4 in Canada and 8 in the US.  Along side our friends at each location we’ll be hosting one-day of youth ministry training comprised of 3 separate seminars for only $5 per person. 

 

This year our seminars will specifically relate to: 


   * The spiritual formation of adolescents
 
   * Dynamics of healthy ministry teams

   * Collaborating with parents for an even more effective youth ministry


The training is designed to challenge you, equip you and inspire you for another year of ministry with youth and their families.  

Not only will you experience the training for only $5.  We’ll also give it to you FREE on a flash drive when you join us at one of the 12 locations –the handouts, the power point slides, the leaders guides – everything we use during our training seminars.  We want you to have the training at your fingertips for use in your own local ministry setting.   We don’t want the cost of training to be the thing to deter your ministry teams from being equipped for the challenges facing us as Sunday school teachers, mentors, small group leaders, mission trip leaders and volunteers.

We want to invite you to go to www.5dollartraining.com  to sign up to be notified of the site launch and to  receive information about our training experience dates and locations, registration and costs.   -Matt and Chris

 

 

I believe this will be a great way for youth leaders and volunteers from our area to connect, learn, network, and share with one another as we discuss the challenges, hopes, dreams, and aspirations for youth ministry in our context.  If you are in the area, we would love to have to come and join us and partner together to help change the face and future of youth ministry here in the Northeast.  I encourage you to look for this training in your region.  If there is not one, then contact Barefoot to see about possibly hosting one in the near future.           

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Here is a sample of what the day will look like as well as the themes and topics discussed. 

 

Topics —

 

Discipleship:            Shaping Students for the Mission of God.

The mission of God is an opportunity for students to learn how they contribute to God’s unfolding story here on earth.  This seminar will look at what the mission of God is and how we can teach students to move into it.

 

Leadership 101:  10 essentials for developing healthy teams

It is critically important that we learn what it means to function in healthy teams as leaders.  God has called us to be contributors and use our passions and gifts to contribute to something that is greater than ourselves.  Learn what the 10 essentials are for developing healthy teams that accomplish more than what we can do by ourselves.

 

Engaging Parents:  Keys to Helping Students Develop an Authentic Faith 

Parents can be one of the most consistent influences in an adolescent’s life.  This seminar will look at how we can involve and encourage parents toward developing a real and authentic faith in the lives of their children.  This seminar will look at the critical journey of faith, the three roles of a parent and what we can do to move a student towards a dynamic faith.

 

 Trainers - Chris Folsmbee and Matt Wilks will be appearing in each city

 

Schedule -

 

9:00 am –                         Registration

 

9:30 to 10:30 am -            Discipleship:            Shaping Students for the Mission of God

 

10:30 to 11:00 am -            Break

 

11:00 to 12:00 pm -            Leadership 101:  10 essentials for developing healthy teams

 

12:00 to 1:00 pm -            Lunch off site and on your own

 

1:00 to 1:30 pm -            Q&A with the trainers

 

1:30 to 2:30/3:00 pm -            Engaging Parents:  Keys to Helping Students Develop an Authentic Faith

 

Cost is: $5 per person

It includes:

- Jump Drive with all the files, powerpoint, notes that we used for those three sessions

- Training manual to be downloaded when you register

- Barefoot Ministries products

 

fivedollar_header

 

Naturally, I am plugging this one-day training event because I believe in its purpose and potential, but what I really want to encourage is for youth leaders to gather together for any kind of training, fellowship, and networking available to you.

 

 I personally find myself continually encouraged, inspired, and blessed after meeting with fellow youth workers (especially those in my local area who can truly relate to my context and students).  I realize that these huge national conventions are appealing and attractive.  Who doesn’t like to worship to Crowder and listen to Doug Fields!

But I have found over the years to get more practical and relevant information and ideas from youth workers doing what I am doing in the same area I am serving.

 

 They are the ones who truly understand the struggles and challenges of our demographics and and dreams of our particular are.

 Let’s face it, youth ministry in Texas is going to look very different than in Michigan.  Students in CA are not the same as in NY (although there are many similarities between the two coasts).  Youth ministry needs to be down contextually and what better way to be trained then in a local context with local youth pastors and volunteers.

5 dollar training attempts to do just that.  If you happen to host or attend one this fall, please let me know and post your thoughts and experiences.

 

 

 

 





Learning to do less…but do it well

1 09 2009

summer-vacation

In case you haven’t noticed, I have not been doing much writing or blogging over the past 2 months…and you know what….I feel pretty good about that.

Like most of you, my school year was extremely busy.  Productive? Yes.  But at times stressful and tiring.   Besides my full time position at church, I also coached baseball and served as a chaplain for a minor league baseball team, while at the same time reading and writing.  So summer came, and I took as much time off as possible.

 My friend Jeremy Zach (blogger @ Small town youth pastor) wrote a great article about the importance of approaching our summer months in a healthy way. I have added the link below.

Summer Youth Ministry

Now, at my church, we still had our annual mission trip and a few occasional fun outings (Six Flags, Beach Day, etc…).  We stopped Sunday school and our regular weekly meetings, and boy did it feel good!

I needed that, and to be quite honest, I actually feel refreshed, renewed, and excited for the new school year to start.  But it wasn’t always that way.

When I first arrived I wanted to impress everyone (especially the parents and elders) and so I planned jam-packed summers to keep our students busy.  We took advantage of the fact that most of them didn’t have school, homework, or jobs (and some really didn’t have a life outside of our church either!)

Almost every night I would be out with the students. We had all of our regular weekly meetings, plus a fun/social outing and outreach event at least once a week.  We did numerous mission trips, day trips, concerts, sleepovers, camping trips.  You name and we probably did it during those summers.  Now, in many ways these were highly successful summers.  Our numbers actually grew during June-August (which is rare) and we did not experience that usual summer let down.  By the time September rolled around, I didn’t need to do any promotion because all of the students were already in the swing of things.  Parents loved that there was something for their children to do because they were able to get them off their hands and out of their homes for a few hours almost every day and for many weekends throughout the summer. 

But do you know what did suffer?  

Let me put it this way:  Do you know Who suffered?…..

Me.

I was completely exhausted at the end of those summers.  My relationships were hurting. My soul was often dry and cracking. I was in need of a sabbath rest (and a nice long sabbatical) but had to get amped up for September to come and really get things moving again.  Year after year I went through this until I realized that I simply could not do it anymore.  I started to dread  the summers and resent my responsibilities. I knew that change had to happen, and as difficult as it was I slowly began to implement those necessary changes. 

Now I know that most people work just as hard in the summers as the rest of the year, unless they are teachers.  But you and I know that being in youth ministry is an entirely different ball game.  There is a huge toll: emotionally, mentally, spiritually, and even physically at times (4am on youth retreats sound familiar?)

Even after having made these transitions, it is still tempting for me to want to offer a packed summer schedule.  Especially when some youth ministries down the road are doing it and my students are either

a) going there instead or

b) complaining and asking why we are not doing all of those activities.

But, I have also seen youth pastor after youth pastor come and go.  They may have action-packed and  full summer and school calendars for a year or two, but inevitably they cannot maintain that pace or approach and they simply do not last.  So, I would rather take things off of my plate and do a little less, but do it well and do it well over a long period of time.

Which is better for students? 

Having 4 years of crazy busy activity…but with two or three different youth pastors?

Or….developing a healthy and long lasting relationship with one youth pastor/leader while experiencing real life together over that same period of time?  We can try to get them all constantly occupied and busy with “church”, but that does not necessarily reflect real life or help form them develop a mature and complete spiritual life.  In some ways, busyness is counterproductive to spiritual formation. 

I recently started running. I hate running and do not consider myself a runner. But nonetheless, I have been running about 4-5 times a week now for about one year.  I run to stay healthy and get in shape, not to impress anyone.  Therefore, I really could care less about my speed or style when I run, but I would like to build up my distance.  My goal is actually to run a half marathon some day….we’ll see!

I quickly learned that if I put all of my energy into sprinting my first mile or so, I can probably run a decent time and look good, but I  have nothing left for the rest of my journey. I would only be able to run a few miles every time before having to stop….before quitting.  

However, if I take my time and pace myself I am able to do a few things.  I can enjoy my time more and take in the beauty of my surroundings.  And secondly, I am able to run longer distances each time I run and eventually work up towards my goal.

I assume by now you are getting this analogy.

As youth pastors, don’t sprint.  You will never reach the finish line or your goals.  Take your time and take it easy.  Condition and pace yourself and enjoy the experience.

You will be healthy and ultimately a healthy youth pastor makes for a healthy youth ministry.

Perhaps reevaluate your upcoming fall schedule or at least plan to take it a bit easier next summer.

You owe it to yourself and to your students.

No need to feel guilty about doing less, if you are able to do it well and do it well for a long time.

Happy running!

heelstrike2