Contemplative Youth Ministry- by Mark Yaconelli

I must admit that I was a bit skeptical prior to reading this book.   However, after reading through the book for a second time, it has become one of my favorite youth ministry books.  Mark Yaconelli has a witty and authentic way of storytelling and teaching how to help students practice the presence of Jesus. I appreciate his journey; his mistakes, failures, lessons learned, and advice he has to offer all of us attempting (and praying) to see our students grow spiritually.

Central to this book is the theme of presence.  The author shares that the central problem in sharing the Christian faith with young people is this:

We don’t know how to be with our kids.

We don’t know how to be with ourselves.

We don’t know how to be with God.

But if we look to the life of Jesus as our example and inspiration, we find that Jesus enjoys being with people and being with God.  ”His ministry doesn’t come from a pre-planned formula but instead arises in response to the real situations and relationships he encounters.”

To be “present” with our students means relating to youth in the way Jesus related to people…with authenticity and transparency.

The idea of “contemplation” means being with God within the reality of the present moment.  As Mark explains, “it’s about attentiveness–opening our eyes to God, ourselves, and others.”

Ignatious of Loyola referred to contemplation as “seeing God in all things.”  Brother Lawrence called it” the pure loving gaze that finds God everywhere.”  Teresa of Avila referred to this experience as “Awareness absorbed and amazed.”

One of the questions asked in the book really spoke to me.  ”What is my deepest hope for the youth I know?”

As I prayed and thought through this, I could sense and feel the way God sees and loves my students.  I began viewing them through God’s eyes and not through my own agendas for them.

I especially appreciated the section dealing with being transparent and vulnerable before our students. Often, the assumption is that as youth leaders we must live above our students and, without realizing it, a certain level of disconnect and unapproachability inevitably creeps in.  Mark writes (and I agree) that youth want to know about our marriages or romantic lives.  They want to meet our friends and find out what we do when not in church.  They want to know what makes us angry and whether we agree or disagree with their parents.

They want to know how to live well and live fully human, and they need us as real examples that they can relate to.

Probably my favorite chapter is entitled “Becoming a Good Listener” simply because I struggle with this approach and quite frankly needed a healthy dose of inspiration and challenge.

The first part of this approach is learning how to surrender.  ”We need to stop trying to make kids love God…to surrender means to recognize that we don’t control how God lives and moves. We don’t control our churches and we certainly don’t control the spiritual lives of our young people.”

As youth leaders, we need to be able to trust that our students belong to God; that God has been seeking to love them since before they were born and will continue to love them long after they leave the influence of our ministries.  This concept is revolutionary to me and freeing in the same breath.

We also need to receive from God, and place our students in positions to receive from Him as well.  ”When we allow ourselves to be open and receptive to God’s love and presence, we begin to notice that God is alive and available.”

Mark provides a great chart comparing/contrasting the different ways we approach youth ministry when we’re rooted in anxiety rather than love.  Interestingly enough, I was able to use the same descriptions and characteristics and compare “traditional” to “emerging” youth ministry approaches .  In many ways, traditional youth ministry is based upon anxiety (control, professionals, products, results, conformity, activity, and answers).  Contrary, emerging youth ministries demonstrate and implement contemplation, processes, presences, guides, relationships, creativity, awareness, and questions.

This chart forced me to critically reflect upon my youth ministry and see how we have been operating in the past:  out of anxiety or love?

The next big section offers different ways to enter into the presence of God. Most are rooted in ancient Christianity and have been transformative for centuries.  Now, I have been doing a number of these for some time, but each process would be powerful if we can find ways to implement them into our youth ministries and model them for our students.

They include: Lectio Divina (holy reading, Centering Prayer (indwelling Christ), The Awareness Examen, Silent Prayer, Creative Arts prayer

By far, the best chapter for me (and I think one of the best chapters in all youth ministry books to date) is “Being with young people”

Being human is “seeing and being seen, hearing and being heard, being moved by others and allowing others to be moved by us, responding with acts of kindness and receiving acts of kindness, and embodying a sense of delight in all our interactions.”  In many ways, author and professor Andrew Root picks up on this theme and wonderfully runs with it in his books Revisiting Relational Youth Ministry and Relationships Unfiltered.

Seeing

We love young people when we see them with the eyes of Jesus; seeing them as they are, not as the culture judges them to be or as we wish them to be.

Yaconelli shares a wonderful story about being on a youth retreat with a particularly terrible bunch of students (haven’t we all had that experience before!)  He became angry and yelled at them and demanded that the fun stop and they all go to bed.  Feeling bad about the way he treated them he got up and walked around the sanctuary where they were sleeping.  Watching them, he began to notice their innocence and remembered their pain and hurt. His anger at them was transformed into compassion for them as he began to see them with the eyes of Christ.

Hearing

We also need to listen; to open our ears to the words and feelings youth speak.  As a youth pastor, I often feel the need (and desire) to speak.  Even when students are unloading their problems and issues, I fight the urge to interrupt with my sound advise. Most of our activities at youth group are designed to help students sit and listen to us. But imagine if we could turn that around and listen to them.  “Its almost a conversion experience in this day and age to be authentically heard by another person.”  I couldn’t agree more.

I debated whether to share this story or not, but here goes.

A few years back I had the priviledge of attending a course on Postmodernity and the Emergent Church taught at Alliance Theological Seminary by Tony Jones.  I had met Tony briefly on a few occasions and we planned to spend some time together after class.  I will never forget the time, attention, and care he gave me while the two of us sat and chatted at an Irish pub in Nyack.  He asked questions like he actually cared about my life and he listened.  He could have talked about his experiences, his writings, his theology..and I would have listened and loved it. But instead, the whole evening was about me.  And the timing was perfect because I had issues that I really needed to talk about with someone, but no one (up to that point) had thought to ask.  I finally felt free to share with someone who would not judge and had no self interest.  My respect and appreciation for Tony grew that night and I left feeling such a weight lifted.

I want to be that kind of friend, mentor, and youth pastor to students.

“Christians, especially ministers, so often think they must always contribute something when they are in the company of others. They forget that listening can be a greater service than speaking. Many people are looking for an ear that will listen.  They person who can no longer listen to others will soon be no longer listening to God either.” -Dietrich Bonhoeffer

Action with Kindness

These are moments in which we embody the love of God.  This love of God “is often more powerful and transformative in small acts of love than in the lights, energy, and charisma of large outreach events.”

We need to take time to experience the everyday moments of life together with our students.  These can occur over simple meals, while driving or shopping, watching a game together, etc..

Before reading this book I associated contemplation with being still…perhaps a monk in isolation in a cave somewhere!

Parker Palmer debunks that thought and writes the following: “At root, contemplation and action are the same. As our youth ministry becomes infused with contemplative prayer and awareness, the effect is not more prayer and silence; instead, what begins to emerge is authentic action. Activities within the youth ministry no longer are chosen frantically from resource books; they no longer are prescribed from the outside.  Instead, as we widen our awareness, our actions with youth become more guided by their needs and the movement of the Holy Spirit.  Being prayerfully present to kids enlarges our capacity to act out of love rather than anxiety. Contemplative awareness nurtures our creativity and draws us to act from the heart. We find ourselves responding more and reacting less.”

Delight

As youth pastors, we should be amazed and delighted by students.  I have found that even though dealing with middle school antics and high school drama can be taxing, there is no greater joy than seeing young people “get it”.  I have more fun with students than with any other age group.  It is fun and a delight to be around them, and I feel blessed to be a part of that on a daily basis.  I know that if and when God leads me to do something else, I will always miss the joy I experience when with young people.

Jean Vanier writes that love is “to reveal the beauty of another person to themselves.”  When students are seen, they feel valued.  When they are heard, they feel respected.  When someone is moved by their situation, they feel loved.  And when others delight in their existence, they sense the very breath of God!

“Youth Ministry is about holding up a young person’s deepest identity until he or she is able to see it too.”

The last major section of the book developes a process of recruiting and training a community around you to serve the youth. Mark calls this a “covenant community” and he outlines some pretty complex and detailed steps to help build up your volunteer leadership team. Now, it is hard to deny the results he shares, but the six steps seem a bit much to me.  However, if you follow them I am sure you can double your team with solid volunteers.

A good point that he makes that we all need to be aware of is this:  You’re not just looking for a warm body, you’re seeking people who sense that their participation in ministry is intimately connected to God’s movement in their lives.   Secondly, when people spend time in prayer and relationship building, the ministry becomes a great source of nourishment; people enjoy the ministry, serve with great authenticity, and stay involved longer.

Another great thought found in this book is the idea that youth ministry is truly a calling and blessing at the same time.  For many of us, we need to be doing youth ministry.  We need to be with and for our students, because by doing so, we connect with God.  Mark writes to all of us youth leaders that perhaps we are more pliable among these youth, more open to God shaking us up or offering us a word of healing. maybe youth ministry is our spiritual discipline.

“It’s not just a place where we serve, it’s a place where we are transformed, healed, and made new.”

Below are a few more helpful and inspiring quotes I discovered.

“It’s this movement from prayer to presence–from being open and available to God to being transparent and accessible before teens-that is the real work of ministry.”

“Our first task as youth ministers is to be with young people just as Jesus was with people.  Our second task is to help youth develop the eyes, ears, and heart of Jesus for themselves.  We’re not only called to be witnesses among young people, we are also called, like Jesus, to be teachers. We’re called to awaken youth to the presence of God in the world.“

To help do this we 1) point 2) question 3) invite 4) we create circumstances

All of this takes patience and time.  Faith takes time and we need to stick around long enough to see it go through its ups and downs, highs and lows, and eventually develope, mature, and blossom.

“Our role is to help youth recognize the ways in which Jesus is already near, already seeking trust and friendship.”

“An efficiently busy life is “more potentially destructive of spiritual growth than debauchery or alcohol or drugs.”

“The purpose of integrating contemplative presence in youth ministry is not to turn kids into monks, it is to deepen our awareness of god, others, and self so that we might become fully alive!”

“Through greater prayer and presence, we notice the moments of connection between youth and God and try to build our programs accordingly.”

Shift #7: From Facts to Experience/Encounter

“It is circumstances, not ideas, that change people.” author and Catholic priest Richard Rohr

Possibly the most significant way we can help youth notice their experiences with God is by helping them engage in real life; in real-life situations (out of the church and class room). We can then ask  them the eye-opening question- “How is God present here?

I once heard this statement:  ”Facts don’t change people.  Experiences change people.”

Now, thinking back to the  Gospels and the book of Acts and the beginnings of the early church, you realize that it was individual’s encounters with the person of Jesus that transformed their life, not necessarily what they believed about him.  In fact, on more than once occasion Jesus healed someone and/or brought deliverance and restoration prior to any theological assent regarding his identity.

Here is a great story taken from the Gospel of John and serves as only one of many like it.

John 9

Jesus Heals a Man Born Blind

¹As he went along, he saw a man blind from birth. ²His disciples asked him, “Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?”

³“Neither this man nor his parents sinned,” said Jesus, “but this happened so that the work of God might be displayed in his life. ⁴As long as it is day, we must do the work of him who sent me. Night is coming, when no one can work. ⁵While I am in the world, I am the light of the world.”

⁶Having said this, he spit on the ground, made some mud with the saliva, and put it on the man’s eyes. ⁷“Go,” he told him, “wash in the Pool of Siloam” (this word means Sent). So the man went and washed, and came home seeing.

⁸His neighbors and those who had formerly seen him begging asked, “Isn’t this the same man who used to sit and beg?” ⁹Some claimed that he was.
Others said, “No, he only looks like him.”
But he himself insisted, “I am the man.”

¹⁰“How then were your eyes opened?” they demanded.

¹¹He replied, “The man they call Jesus made some mud and put it on my eyes. He told me to go to Siloam and wash. So I went and washed, and then I could see.”

¹²“Where is this man?” they asked him.
“I don’t know,” he said.

¹³They brought to the Pharisees the man who had been blind. ¹⁴Now the day on which Jesus had made the mud and opened the man’s eyes was a Sabbath.¹⁵Therefore the Pharisees also asked him how he had received his sight. “He put mud on my eyes,” the man replied, “and I washed, and now I see.”

¹⁶Some of the Pharisees said, “This man is not from God, for he does not keep the Sabbath.”
But others asked, “How can a sinner do such miraculous signs?” So they were divided.

¹⁷Finally they turned again to the blind man, “What have you to say about him? It was your eyes he opened.”
The man replied, “He is a prophet.”

¹⁸The Jews still did not believe that he had been blind and had received his sight until they sent for the man’s parents. ¹⁹“Is this your son?” they asked. “Is this the one you say was born blind? How is it that now he can see?”

²⁰“We know he is our son,” the parents answered, “and we know he was born blind. ²¹But how he can see now, or who opened his eyes, we don’t know. Ask him. He is of age; he will speak for himself.” ²²His parents said this because they were afraid of the Jews, for already the Jews had decided that anyone who acknowledged that Jesus was the Christ would be put out of the synagogue. ²³That was why his parents said, “He is of age; ask him.”

²⁴A second time they summoned the man who had been blind. “Give glory to God,” they said. “We know this man is a sinner.”

²⁵He replied, “Whether he is a sinner or not, I don’t know. One thing I do know. I was blind but now I see!”

²⁶Then they asked him, “What did he do to you? How did he open your eyes?”

²⁷He answered, “I have told you already and you did not listen. Why do you want to hear it again? Do you want to become his disciples, too?”

²⁸Then they hurled insults at him and said, “You are this fellow’s disciple! We are disciples of Moses! ²⁹We know that God spoke to Moses, but as for this fellow, we don’t even know where he comes from.”

³⁰The man answered, “Now that is remarkable! You don’t know where he comes from, yet he opened my eyes. ³¹We know that God does not listen to sinners. He listens to the godly man who does his will. ³²Nobody has ever heard of opening the eyes of a man born blind. ³³If this man were not from God, he could do nothing.”

³⁴To this they replied, “You were steeped in sin at birth; how dare you lecture us!” And they threw him out.

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What is apparent from this story is that the Pharisees were trying to trap Jesus, pin him down, and squeeze him into a particular theological box.  The blind man probably figured that Jesus was a prophet of some kind and perhaps gave his specific answer out of fear of the Pharisees.  Or perhaps, he really didn’t have many facts or beliefs about this man called Jesus, but he certainly knew what he just experienced. He was literally blind and now he could see, and this man named Jesus healed him!

I think in youth ministry what often happens is that we try to get students to believe certain things about Jesus before we really enable them to encounter him.  Maybe the encounter is what must predicate the belief.

In Youth Ministry 3.0, Marko uses a great analogy of a train to illustrate the difference of progression towards faith, and (ultimately) the importance of fact vs. faith.

Marko argues that in the past, facts could drive the engine of personal belief.  These “facts” would lead to a faith that was based upon those “facts”.  Experience could be helpful, but often not necessary and often declared they would get in way of true and authentic faith.  Now I understand what the writer of Hebrews says, ” ¹Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see. ²This is what the ancients were commended for.”

It is true that if God were to audibly speak or perform wonders and signs all the time in front of my students, it would not take a deep faith to believe in him.  So, the less amount of experiences we have, the potential is there to develop a stronger type of faith. However, a faith built solely upon facts may not be standing on solid ground.

Here is why.

Which “facts” are included as essential and who makes that call?  What if some beliefs or ideas that were considered “facts” a few generations ago are no longer held in the same light as they once were?

Imagine building a faith on the “fact” that the earth was flat and at the center of the universe?  Oh wait, most Christians did that a few centuries ago and excommunicated those who believed otherwise as heretics.

What if we are building our faith today on facts that may or may not be credible? What happens when one of those ideas comes crashing down?  In this book Velvet Elvis, Rob Bell uses the analogy of building your faith just based upon facts and likens it to building a wall of bricks.

Two things occur when Christians do this:

1) We spend a whole lot of time defending our wall, protecting it from bricks that do not belong, and trying to keep people outside (that’s what walls do)

2)  We open up the possibility of the entire wall crumbling down if one of the bricks happens to be pulled out or damaged. (kind of like that game Jenga)

Now, here is what I am not saying…Facts do not matter. They do. They are important . They are essential,

The apostle Paul writes this in 1 Corinthians 14:12-14

¹²But if it is preached that Christ has been raised from the dead, how can some of you say that there is no resurrection of the dead? ¹³If there is no resurrection of the dead, then not even Christ has been raised. ¹⁴And if Christ has not been raised, our preaching is useless and so is your faith.”

So clearly, a faith built upon myths or false ideas that cannot be historical and factually proven is not going to last.  There would be no real power in that kind of faith.  The life, death, and resurrection of Christ is essential according to the apostles, as is his divinity and humanity.

One of the earlier statements of “facts” and theology believed by the early church was this:

⁶Who, being in very nature  God,
did not consider equality with God something to be grasped,
⁷but made himself nothing,
taking the very nature of a servant,
being made in human likeness.
⁸And being found in appearance as a man,
he humbled himself
and became obedient to death—
even death on a cross!
⁹Therefore God exalted him to the highest place
and gave him the name that is above every name,
¹⁰that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow,
in heaven and on earth and under the earth,
¹¹and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord,
to the glory of God the Father.     -Philippians 2

¹⁵He is the image of the invisible God, the firstborn over all creation. ¹⁶For by him all things were created: things in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or powers or rulers or authorities; all things were created by him and for him. ¹⁷He is before all things, and in him all things hold together. ¹⁸And he is the head of the body, the church; he is the beginning and the firstborn from among the dead, so that in everything he might have the supremacy. ¹⁹For God was pleased to have all his fullness dwell in him, ²⁰and through him to reconcile to himself all things, whether things on earth or things in heaven, by making peace through his blood, shed on the cross.   – Colossians 1:15-20

These appear to be some of the earliest doctrines recorded in Scripture and clearly what we can, and should, build our beliefs upon.   Beyond these, I am just not sure what exactly is essential and what is not, and therefore constructing and communicating a faith built or driven by a whole host of “facts” can become potentially dangerous.

And you know that’s true when we see our high school students enter college and told that many of these “facts” don’t exist (whether true or not).  We watch as their faith begins to crumble under the weight of doubt and uncertainty.  Now, we can try to give them new books on apologetics and thus begins a battle for their minds- beliefs about something and someone.

But…. if their hearts are already won because of their personal experience with the transforming and freeing power of Jesus…well that is a different story.

Back to the illustration of the train.  If experience/encounter lead the way, these cannot be easily discredited. One of the so-called ideals of postmodernity is that personal experience is everything. You will hear statements such as this, “Well that may be true for you, but this is what is true for me.”  Now this can be both a blessing and curse at the same time. Traditional apologetics don’t work in this scenario very often.  Sure, you will have exceptions, but it is very hard to “prove your point” to someone from a purely intellectual and rationalistic approach.

You can say 2+2 =4 and someone can say, “I see how you can come to belief that, but for me that equation does not work”.

Right or wrong, this is our generation of students. We can try to change them back into older worldviews, but we will spend energy fighting a losing battle and over time frustration will set in like trying to swim upstream against the current.    They have been taught (not modeled) a faith based mostly upon facts, and often these facts can be and should be questioned.  Some “facts” are Biblically based, while many are more products of culture and particular western worldviews than anything else.

What if God is calling us to reach students where they are at? (whether we understand or agree with the way they see life)

What if youth leaders focus on bringing students into a relationship with the person of Jesus. These “God-experiences” can broaden their perspectives on the spiritual,  and through the presence of the Holy Spirit, can lead to a personal faith.  This personal faith can and should lead to a desire to know more about the person of Jesus (which is built upon a core set of beliefs and “facts”).  Again, these are important, but maybe not what needs to drive our approach anymore.

Students still have questions that need to be answered. But for this generation, these questions are no longer about the credibility of the Bible and manuscripts, etc..  Sure some historical questions will arise from Dan Brown books and they can and should be addressed, but the issues students question have more to do with heart-felt concerns than purely academic or intellectual curiosity.

They are asking questions such:

Why does God allow suffering in the world?

How could a loving God send people to Hell?

Why isn’t Christianity more inclusive?

How can one religion be “right” and the others “wrong”?

Why have so many wars been fought in the name of God?

I am grateful for new approaches in apologetics such as Tim Keller who uses human reason and questions and uses these legitimate questions and concerns to point people to the reality and truth of God.

Generally, I have steered away from traditional apologetics, believing that Christ needs to be promoted more than defended. One author of the book iLead writes, “thoughtful apologetics are essential for reaching post-Christian, American teens.”   For starters, postmodern students are all about personal experience. call it what you want, but it is not going to change.  So if you want factual knowledge and evidence that demands a verdict to really appeal, you are going to have to start looking at some other generation.

I suppose arguments such as those advocated by Tim Keller, C.S. Lewis, and Ravi Zacharias are beneficial for students thinking about truth, philosophy, and the like.  However, in my experience, most teens are drawn to the experience and encounter of Christ.  As the author later states, “until our teens can see that Christ quenches their souls’ spiritual thirst more than the world, they will always pursue idols to their own harm.”  Therefore, as youth leaders we must unapologetically promote Jesus and allow His very life and nature to be on display in and through us.  To me, that is the living Word of God in action.

What drives and motivates students today?

Not facts. Not anymore.

They are bombarded with facts.  It is experiences that they want.  That appears to be the way this generation of students understand, process, and relate to life.

Who can blame them for wanting a concrete encounter with the transcendant God and not just a bunch of ancient ideas and texts, that (in reality) speak very little into their cultural context at first glance.

Today’s youth  long for and embrace experience.  They dream and desire deep encounter; with one another and with the transcendant and spiritual.

Isn’t that what Jesus offered?

His followers knew him. They met him. They encountered him and he changed their life.

Students believe what they see, feel, hear, taste, and touch.  They believe what they experience.

I believe that our God is one who wants us to experience him. To taste and see that the Lord is good.

As culture, society, and students evolve and change, let’s shift our approach from facts to experience and encounter; towards introducing our students to this person who can open their eyes, heal their brokenness, restore them to God, and give them a hope and a future.

The train is moving.  Will we be watching it pass, shoveling coal in the back, or at the controls excited for the adventure?

5 Dollar Training

                                                                                                                          

 

This fall (Saturday October 3), BCC has the honor of hosting Barefoot Ministries  $5.00 youth leader training. We are one of 8 host churches in the nation and will be representing the greater NYC metro area and the North East. For more information, check out the link below.  

5 dollar training

Here is a letter from Matt Wilks and Chris Folmsbee, two of the trainers for the day and now on staff with Barefoot Ministries.

_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Greetings!

Since its beginning in 2001, Barefoot Ministries has worked to serve churches around the world by publishing resources that help guide students into spiritual formation for the mission of God.  In addition to publishing resources for youth workers, Barefoot will be providing youth ministry training that will strengthen this core focus.

Beginning this fall, we will be in 12 cities in North America – 4 in Canada and 8 in the US.  Along side our friends at each location we’ll be hosting one-day of youth ministry training comprised of 3 separate seminars for only $5 per person. 

 

This year our seminars will specifically relate to: 

   * The spiritual formation of adolescents
 
   * Dynamics of healthy ministry teams

   * Collaborating with parents for an even more effective youth ministry


The training is designed to challenge you, equip you and inspire you for another year of ministry with youth and their families.  

Not only will you experience the training for only $5.  We’ll also give it to you FREE on a flash drive when you join us at one of the 12 locations –the handouts, the power point slides, the leaders guides – everything we use during our training seminars.  We want you to have the training at your fingertips for use in your own local ministry setting.   We don’t want the cost of training to be the thing to deter your ministry teams from being equipped for the challenges facing us as Sunday school teachers, mentors, small group leaders, mission trip leaders and volunteers.

We want to invite you to go to www.5dollartraining.com  to sign up to be notified of the site launch and to  receive information about our training experience dates and locations, registration and costs.   -Matt and Chris

 

 

I believe this will be a great way for youth leaders and volunteers from our area to connect, learn, network, and share with one another as we discuss the challenges, hopes, dreams, and aspirations for youth ministry in our context.  If you are in the area, we would love to have to come and join us and partner together to help change the face and future of youth ministry here in the Northeast.  I encourage you to look for this training in your region.  If there is not one, then contact Barefoot to see about possibly hosting one in the near future.           

Here is a sample of what the day will look like as well as the themes and topics discussed. 

 

Topics —

 

Discipleship:            Shaping Students for the Mission of God.

The mission of God is an opportunity for students to learn how they contribute to God’s unfolding story here on earth.  This seminar will look at what the mission of God is and how we can teach students to move into it.

 

Leadership 101:  10 essentials for developing healthy teams

It is critically important that we learn what it means to function in healthy teams as leaders.  God has called us to be contributors and use our passions and gifts to contribute to something that is greater than ourselves.  Learn what the 10 essentials are for developing healthy teams that accomplish more than what we can do by ourselves.

 

Engaging Parents:  Keys to Helping Students Develop an Authentic Faith 

Parents can be one of the most consistent influences in an adolescent’s life.  This seminar will look at how we can involve and encourage parents toward developing a real and authentic faith in the lives of their children.  This seminar will look at the critical journey of faith, the three roles of a parent and what we can do to move a student towards a dynamic faith.

 

 Trainers - Chris Folsmbee and Matt Wilks will be appearing in each city

 

Schedule -

 

9:00 am –                         Registration

 

9:30 to 10:30 am -            Discipleship:            Shaping Students for the Mission of God

 

10:30 to 11:00 am -            Break

 

11:00 to 12:00 pm -            Leadership 101:  10 essentials for developing healthy teams

 

12:00 to 1:00 pm -            Lunch off site and on your own

 

1:00 to 1:30 pm -            Q&A with the trainers

 

1:30 to 2:30/3:00 pm -            Engaging Parents:  Keys to Helping Students Develop an Authentic Faith

 

Cost is: $5 per person

It includes:

- Jump Drive with all the files, powerpoint, notes that we used for those three sessions

- Training manual to be downloaded when you register

- Barefoot Ministries products

 

 

Naturally, I am plugging this one-day training event because I believe in its purpose and potential, but what I really want to encourage is for youth leaders to gather together for any kind of training, fellowship, and networking available to you.

 

 I personally find myself continually encouraged, inspired, and blessed after meeting with fellow youth workers (especially those in my local area who can truly relate to my context and students).  I realize that these huge national conventions are appealing and attractive.  Who doesn’t like to worship to Crowder and listen to Doug Fields!

But I have found over the years to get more practical and relevant information and ideas from youth workers doing what I am doing in the same area I am serving.

 

 They are the ones who truly understand the struggles and challenges of our demographics and and dreams of our particular are.

 Let’s face it, youth ministry in Texas is going to look very different than in Michigan.  Students in CA are not the same as in NY (although there are many similarities between the two coasts).  Youth ministry needs to be down contextually and what better way to be trained then in a local context with local youth pastors and volunteers.

5 dollar training attempts to do just that.  If you happen to host or attend one this fall, please let me know and post your thoughts and experiences.

 

 

 

 

Learning to do less…but do it well

In case you haven’t noticed, I have not been doing much writing or blogging over the past 2 months…and you know what….I feel pretty good about that.

Like most of you, my school year was extremely busy.  Productive? Yes.  But at times stressful and tiring.   Besides my full time position at church, I also coached baseball and served as a chaplain for a minor league baseball team, while at the same time reading and writing.  So summer came, and I took as much time off as possible.

 My friend Jeremy Zach (blogger @ Small town youth pastor) wrote a great article about the importance of approaching our summer months in a healthy way. I have added the link below.

Summer Youth Ministry

Now, at my church, we still had our annual mission trip and a few occasional fun outings (Six Flags, Beach Day, etc…).  We stopped Sunday school and our regular weekly meetings, and boy did it feel good!

I needed that, and to be quite honest, I actually feel refreshed, renewed, and excited for the new school year to start.  But it wasn’t always that way.

When I first arrived I wanted to impress everyone (especially the parents and elders) and so I planned jam-packed summers to keep our students busy.  We took advantage of the fact that most of them didn’t have school, homework, or jobs (and some really didn’t have a life outside of our church either!)

Almost every night I would be out with the students. We had all of our regular weekly meetings, plus a fun/social outing and outreach event at least once a week.  We did numerous mission trips, day trips, concerts, sleepovers, camping trips.  You name and we probably did it during those summers.  Now, in many ways these were highly successful summers.  Our numbers actually grew during June-August (which is rare) and we did not experience that usual summer let down.  By the time September rolled around, I didn’t need to do any promotion because all of the students were already in the swing of things.  Parents loved that there was something for their children to do because they were able to get them off their hands and out of their homes for a few hours almost every day and for many weekends throughout the summer. 

But do you know what did suffer?  

Let me put it this way:  Do you know Who suffered?…..

Me.

I was completely exhausted at the end of those summers.  My relationships were hurting. My soul was often dry and cracking. I was in need of a sabbath rest (and a nice long sabbatical) but had to get amped up for September to come and really get things moving again.  Year after year I went through this until I realized that I simply could not do it anymore.  I started to dread  the summers and resent my responsibilities. I knew that change had to happen, and as difficult as it was I slowly began to implement those necessary changes. 

Now I know that most people work just as hard in the summers as the rest of the year, unless they are teachers.  But you and I know that being in youth ministry is an entirely different ball game.  There is a huge toll: emotionally, mentally, spiritually, and even physically at times (4am on youth retreats sound familiar?)

Even after having made these transitions, it is still tempting for me to want to offer a packed summer schedule.  Especially when some youth ministries down the road are doing it and my students are either

a) going there instead or

b) complaining and asking why we are not doing all of those activities.

But, I have also seen youth pastor after youth pastor come and go.  They may have action-packed and  full summer and school calendars for a year or two, but inevitably they cannot maintain that pace or approach and they simply do not last.  So, I would rather take things off of my plate and do a little less, but do it well and do it well over a long period of time.

Which is better for students? 

Having 4 years of crazy busy activity…but with two or three different youth pastors?

Or….developing a healthy and long lasting relationship with one youth pastor/leader while experiencing real life together over that same period of time?  We can try to get them all constantly occupied and busy with “church”, but that does not necessarily reflect real life or help form them develop a mature and complete spiritual life.  In some ways, busyness is counterproductive to spiritual formation. 

I recently started running. I hate running and do not consider myself a runner. But nonetheless, I have been running about 4-5 times a week now for about one year.  I run to stay healthy and get in shape, not to impress anyone.  Therefore, I really could care less about my speed or style when I run, but I would like to build up my distance.  My goal is actually to run a half marathon some day….we’ll see!

I quickly learned that if I put all of my energy into sprinting my first mile or so, I can probably run a decent time and look good, but I  have nothing left for the rest of my journey. I would only be able to run a few miles every time before having to stop….before quitting.  

However, if I take my time and pace myself I am able to do a few things.  I can enjoy my time more and take in the beauty of my surroundings.  And secondly, I am able to run longer distances each time I run and eventually work up towards my goal.

I assume by now you are getting this analogy.

As youth pastors, don’t sprint.  You will never reach the finish line or your goals.  Take your time and take it easy.  Condition and pace yourself and enjoy the experience.

You will be healthy and ultimately a healthy youth pastor makes for a healthy youth ministry.

Perhaps reevaluate your upcoming fall schedule or at least plan to take it a bit easier next summer.

You owe it to yourself and to your students.

No need to feel guilty about doing less, if you are able to do it well and do it well for a long time.

Happy running!